I sometimes get discouraged by the unwillingness of other people to show their support for those who need it most.  I encounter this as both and animal rights advocate and LGBT advocate.  Recently Ethan and I attended a kick off event for the Week of Respect as part of National Bullying Awareness Month. Part of the evening included a screening of the documentary, Bullied. At this event there were a total of 17 attendees not counting members of the various organizations who were there as part of a panel. During the event I had several eye opening, soul stirring moments. Our town, where the event took place, is considered very liberal and open.  In fact, 20 percent of the families have either 2 moms or 2 dads.  Nevertheless, we couldn’t get members of the LGBT community to show up for an anti-bullying discussion. I am choosing to ignore the lack of straight turn out as I am concerned with the apathy within my own segment of the community. This event was about standing up for LGBT students.  And yet, almost no one showed up. This sends a message similar to the message sent when laws against LGBT equality are passed – that we don’t matter.  When I voiced my frustration and disappointment on Facebook, it was met with comments like, “we were too busy with parenting, ” or “it wasn’t a convenient time,” and the like. But when a kid gets bullied would the parents use that same excuse?

It is so discouraging when people directly affected by something refuse to show up. I even received a message from someone after my Facebook post who said, “I am sorry for the poor turn out. I know this an important issue for you.” For me?!? The person who wrote that is gay. This is an important issue for anyone who is part of the LGBT community whether a direct member or a friend or family member. This distancing of oneself from the issue keeps people from getting involved and speaking up. I walked away with a feeling of, “if LGBT parents and parents of LGBT students won’t show up for an event that has a direct personal connection to them, how can I get someone to stop using animals when animals are a completely unrelated entity?” In that moment, I wanted to give up my activism.  I was facing the big WB, “Why Bother?”

Almost as soon as I asked the question, I had the answer;  because I care.  If everyone were discouraged by a lack of support or general apathy, nothing would ever get done. Yes, attendance was low at this event, but I was there. And by voicing my disappointment, perhaps more people will make an effort to attend the next event. Keeping this mindset is imperative when you are going against the mainstream. As our tagline says, “one meal at a time.”

I would love everyone to go vegan and stop the use and exploitation of animals. But if I can get one person to not eat an animal for even one meal, that made a difference to an animal who life was spared. A while back when I was ordering a bagel on the way to work and asked for the tofu spread, the woman behind me on line said to me, “Tofu spread, is it good?” I assured her it was. She then changed her order from cream cheese to the tofu spread. In that moment, I changed one person for one meal. If someone makes one of our recipes just one time, that is one meal at which the amount of animal products consumed was reduced.

My dear husband likes to quote Colleen Patrick Goudreau, and really, who doesn’t?  He often refers to her famous line, “Don’t do nothing just because you can’t do everything. Do something — anything.”  Can I eliminate bullying? No, but that doesn’t stop me from showing up and letting people know that they need to also. Can I make everyone vegan overnight? No, but that doesn’t mean I will stop being vegan myself or sharing my recipes. So I will leave you with one of my favorite CPG quotes, “May our daily choices be a reflection of our deepest values, and may we use our voices to speak for those who need us most, those who have no voice, those who have no choice.” Just because I can’t change everyone, doesn’t mean I will stand idly by while those with no voice cannot be heard. I will speak for them.